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Imagine, if this is the moment that we look back to as the first sign we got of my illness? After months of treatment, I’m laying pale in the hospital clothes and we think about this exact moment. How immortal we felt, how naïve we were?
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“Oh, so you had a little break from travelling, that’s nice!” I flashed an awkward smile as I thought to myself my life wasn’t exactly something I needed a break from. How the conversation made it sound like even travelling was work I was obligated to do and needed a vacation from.
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It was very stressful as the trip was very expensive, there was no cancellation policy and we had no insurance. And yet, I never think about any of it. It’s not the story I tell myself.
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It’s over. We’re done and gone. Our visas have expired, our accounts have been closed permanently and we’re not welcome anymore. It was our home for 2 years and suddenly we can’t go back.
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After struggling to find a job in the new area I finally started in a new position. Except that I only lasted there three days.
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I draw a line on the board and ask you to make it shorter without touching it. What do you do? You draw a longer line next to it.
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There’s three options: I’d become a president, an astronaut or a terrorist. Somewhere in the future, when I’d fulfill the prophecy – I’d become important, successful, appreciated and maybe someday, happy.
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I’m a dream come true. I’m a promise of the better days. I’m a leader of the future.
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This might well be the last birthday I ever celebrated, so I acted accordingly. Embrace ageing and celebrate life, one day it’ll be the last party you attend.
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Soon I found myself thinking about the future, how regardless of the situation now, after this vacation again we’d have no money. Everything was fine in the moment, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the risk of ending up like in the beginning of the year
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Travel Thoughts 